Brains & Biceps
A Weekly Column By Laura Kline, BSN-RN and future NPC Figure Competitor
If You Have Nothing Nice To Say..
"Do you eat a sweet potato everyday?" Yep."Why? Doesn't it get old?"Nope. I don't eat for pleasure. I eat to live, not live to eat."Well I would just get sick of it, that's crazy.
Everyday it is something new it seems! Whether it is someone at work while I am trying to eat lunch in PEACE or if it is someone at the gym questioning why I want to have muscles. I know I am not alone, I hear multiple people telling me stories of situations they find themselves in where they are questioned about their lifestyle, and not in a sweet innocent way. I have been so stressed out during lunch at work lately that I have thought about just eating in a separate room so that I can have peace! I shouldn't be stressed out when I eat just because someone else is. I don't approach people and ask them why they are eating French fries or cake everyday, I let them do what they want and I leave it at that. Could you imagine if I asked someone if they were trying to get fat or something? How wild would that be!?
I have nothing against other females at the gym but when they use their time to socialize and flirt and not train it makes it hard for us girls who are actually training for something and have no time for chit chatting. I wrote in another article about how I was bothered at the gym by one man that actually put his hands on me and still to this day men are trying to get too close. They will stand in my way, try to help me load/unload weights or they will flat out interrupt me in the middle of a training session. Sometimes these guys will question me about why I want muscle or why I want to be strong. During my off season training I even had one guy ask me why I wasn't lean if I was trying to compete in a figure competition (which he related to modeling clothing, dumb ass!)! I only have so much patience with people and it is running thin unfortunately. I try so hard to avoid being bothered by people and I shouldn't have to! It should be common sense to know not to harass people about their choices, especially when they are positive and life progressing decisions.
About two weeks ago while I was at work I was speaking with a doctor that knows about my training and told him I had already lost 12lbs. His ignorant response was, "I can't tell."I was frustrated all evening about it thinking who does this person think they are? He even suggested that I get a coach, the same one that a coworker who is an IFBB pro used (I was LIVID). Well I guess he never listens because not only did I have a coach but it was the same one he was referring to. The next day I went straight up to him and told him he doesn't see my body everyday and he doesn't know how I look under my work clothes. He said "okay okay" and just blew it off. A week later I posted some progress pictures after my weight was down 14lbs and he made a couple comments on them basically saying "way to go." While I appreciated the nice comments I decided I was done allowing people from work to see me and my progress so I deleted them all from my social networking site. Sure I didn't want to have to do this because some of these people are truly my friends but my personal life outside of work is not going to be discussed any further and having them on my page will only cause that to happen.
I hope that no one lets anyone bring them down just because they are doing what is right and someone is jealous because they are always doing what is wrong. It does suck to be harassed constantly about my lifestyle choices but it is my life and I decide how to live it, not them! I am personally going to work on my responses during these situations that will discontinue the urge for these people to speak to me about my training. I do not want to be a bitch, I want to be able to converse with in a way that is assertive yet gentle. If I have nothing nice to say to them, or if I feel myself getting angry, I will just have to walk away and deal with it later. I refuse to let anyone stress me out during my prep (or ever for that matter) so if I need to set up some walls and boundaries then so be it. I hope that if you take anything from this article it is the strength to stand up to those who question you and your endeavors while maintaining your composure and with a damn smile on your face!!
"I'm not concerned with your liking or disliking me¦ All I ask is that you respect me as a human being." - Jackie Robinson