Time to take a deep breath..and relax and enjoy this wonderful thing we call "Victory". 11 weeks of Training for less than 3 minutes in the cage!! Insanity..and every drop of sweat I shed, every tear in my moment of weakness, every bruise and every missed outing with friends and glass of wine or bar of chocolate was soooo worth it and thensome!! In fact, I have always been dedicated to the sport, but never like this. After getting my first loss in my second fight, something changed in me. I would never be the same person or fighter again after that. Self doubt, self pity, demons from the past, losing your will and underestimation, all equal failure in the end. I vowed to never give up again mentally or physically. I got deeply back into my spirituality, studied all types of mental training and sports psychology and I changed the way I think and the way I feel, mainly about myself. Honestly, I've always been in my own way. It was time to dust it all off and clear a new path. So I did. I never complained, I just did. I went above and beyond what I thought were my limitations and surpassed them. On Aug 13th I spent the entire day envisioning my fight the way I had played it out in my head over and over again for all possible situations, I was calmer then I have ever been for any fight or grappling tournament. It was almost surreal how under control I had everything. My husband felt it too. I think having my children come up to NH with us helped calm me as well, you can always find peace around children...I was in good company with friends and family as well and my trusty Boneyard Soldiers of course. I felt safe. When it was time to warmup I needed my focus time so everyone but my husband and team left to watch the fights. Funny story is I got more hurt warming up with a bloody nose, than I did in the actual fight. Go figure! My opponents team kept watching us to the point my trainers were extremely annoyed, very inconsiderate to the fighter. But I let it go, yet the nerves began to slowly chime in. Closer and closer I got to go time. I was soo nervous and what a very long walk to the cage, god it's awful! And oops guess what? I forgot my chin guards.. So after making my entrance, we rushed to put them on and I stepped in the cage! Did a little run around and waiting in my corner for my opponent to enter. I thought of all the things I needed to as I waited, I didn't think about her at all. Round one..tap gloves we are exchanging, I throw a high kick, which she catches, so I punish with punches for it until we land against the cage, even when she has me against the cage, I'm the one doing work. I turn her and start landing one after another Muay thai knees. One buckles her, I take the opportunity to take her down and immediately start throwing hammerfists. The ref pulls me off.. Tko!! Then we notice vomit everywhere, on me as well. Her corner cried wolf with saying I had landed a knee to the groin, which video shows never occurred, trying to save themselves, yet beyond unfair to me. She reacted to the knee she could not withstand to her midsection, nothing illegal in that. And still they give her ten minutes to recover and restart the fight, all the while I'm extremely confused. We exchange again, the only shot from her I felt was a left hook, I kept throwing punches, kicks a teep and a knee. We are against the cage. She continues to attempt the takedown, giving me her head, I attemp the guillotine, in the process I throw her down from the choke to the mat, GNP a bit and take the back and RNC with 2 seconds left in the first rd. Wow, I won twice in one night technically. I call it karma, and call her teams bluff. I shake hands and hug her, I really did feel bad for what happened to her, but I did nothing wrong, just wanted to let her know it's all about the fight and I hoped she was okay. Then I jumped for joy and hit the mat and jumped on my husband the second he came in the cage..my trainers were so happy and impressed. I was impressed with myself. I was so happy I can't really put it in words. Only I know where I've been and what I've been through and how much it means to won that fight and get to the place I am now, and right now all I want to do is enjoy the moment!! I want to thank my friends who came all the way to see me fight, my team mates, my trainers, my husband and kids and my sponsors, Slade from Tussle Fight Gear, Fight Soap, Fight Chix, Tracy from Cage Candy, Boston Brawler, lead creative group, and nutritional edge and of course the awesome Jason Adams who has become a very good friend of mine in the past year for promoting us female fighters!!