The Trials and Tribulations of My First Figure Show by Lindsey McFerran

The O' Sh*t Experience: The Conclusion:

Hello again Fellow Blog readers,
I know you absolutely love it when I leave you with those cliffhanger endings...... So I bet you have not been able to sleep because you have anxiously been wondering how I placed in my first Figure show.

Well DRUM ROLL PLEASE............

I took Eight place, so in other words, I came in DEAD LAST. Did you hear me America, I came in Last place, meaning no tiara (tears) or no chance to go up onstage again.

But you know what, even though I came in DEAD LAST, it does not bother me one bit. I mean, don't get me wrong, it stung a little bit, but I mean, I have to look at it like a learning experience. Like the time I stuck my finger in a cigarette lighter, which is a lesson I learned never to do again.

Sorry, little flashback to my childhood, but but to my first show, boy did I learn a lot of things. The list ranges from how my body responded to carb loading, water depletion, the tanner, the pump up.

But the biggest thing I learned was I need to work on my posing and stage presence. I mean I had the package (brush the dirt off my shoulders). Everyone told me I had the package, the judges, my trainers, fellow competitors. But since my posing was soooo sooooo sooooo bad, I was not able to preset the package. SO I guess you could say I was like a badly wrapped present.

So there are my trials and tribulations of my first Figure show, trying to shed some light for all you rookies out there. But this story does actually turn out to have a happy ending. I did my second show about a month afterwards, and let's just say in that month in-between, I tweaked everything.

But most important I worked on my posing, I was a posing fiend, I swear I should have gone to POSERS ANONYMOUS. LOL JK, little humor. I hit the stage looking and feeling about 100 times better. SO I ended up taking Second place, not too shabby for a ROOKIE.

Thanks for reading, and stay tuned for my next blog, where I will share some more wisdom with you.

But first, check out my quick do's and don't list, a little crash course for all you FIRST TIMERS out there!!!!!!

Dont's:
* Don't think just because you put on two coats of tanner that you are tan enough, because you AREN"T!!!!!!
* Don't spread your legs when you are posing because it just makes you look like a cheap whore.
* Don't forget to put the bikini bite on the top piece of your suit so that you don't FLASH THE AUDIENCE!!!! (thank God someone told me this one before I stepped out onstage)
* Don't be afraid to talk (or in my case flirt) with the competitors backstage.

DO'S
* Do smile until your cheeks hurt.
* Do make sure you wear your heels when pumping up so you are warmed up in wearing them and don't trip on your ass.
* Do practice your posing EARLY, not the night before, so you kind of know what you are doing out there.
* Do enjoy every moment of it because you have worked extremely hard for it.

Until next time, keep training hard and your eye on the PRIZE!!!!!
AYO AYO AYO!!! Ladies and Gentleman